Chapter 20 Resentment
He rarely entered her room, and even if he did occasionally, it was mostly to satisfy his own desires.
It is not a shameful thing to have a desire for his wife, but he just feels extremely disgusted. He hates that face that makes people hate him, and even hates that she is obviously repulsive and afraid, but she still accepts it, which makes people hate her.
I wish I could hold her down and bully her until she cries.
Even he didn't notice it. Slowly, he spent more and more time in her room: one worked as a female celebrity, and the other read books. Sometimes they couldn't speak a few words a day, but getting along like that made people not feel at all.
Bored, even a little relieved.
Until one day...she started avoiding him consciously or unconsciously.
Even he felt surprised - he clearly had no experience in the dream, but when he woke up, he knew inexplicably that all the changes started when his mother scolded her for her loose words and deeds, and forbade her to seduce him.
She didn't live well at all in this family.
After that incident, my grandmother was sad and disappointed, and her health deteriorated. She had long ignored Song Yun's wishes.
Her mother often scolded her for trivial matters, and her sisters did not take her as the second sister-in-law seriously at all, and often ordered her to do this and that. The second young mistress often stayed up late to make handkerchiefs and sachets for them——
Even the purse Su Lin gave away when she got married was embroidered by her after several days and nights.
But even so, she never told herself a word of grievance. On the contrary, he himself, because of her neglect and avoidance, could not help but feel a bit resentful in his heart. He often made sarcastic remarks and deliberately made her angry, but she just suffered in silence.
Never defend yourself even half a cent.
In the days when spring was approaching, she was busy helping Su Lin embroider her dowry and preparing clothes and knee pads for him to die. Finally, she was overwhelmed and fell ill.
His mother did not allow him to visit her.
She even threw away the clothes and kneepads she had worked so hard to make, just because she was afraid of giving them to him after she was sick.
But that night, while everyone was sleeping, he went to Song Yunpan's room by accident.
He knew what his mother was worried about - it was simply that he felt that he had failed to marry a wife who would help his future career, and that Song Yunpan was dragging him down. But he, a tall, seven-foot-old man, did not expect to rely on his in-laws to become a successful man.
.What's more, those ladies from famous families were so pampered and domineering that he was afraid of avoiding them in the past. How could he want to marry them and live together day and night?
What really bothered him all the time was that Song Yunwan had resorted to tricks to marry him. But now that time has passed, the anger and unwillingness he felt at that time seemed to have been diluted by time.
Song Yunpan was just a little girl who had no father or mother and was dependent on others. Even if she was plotted against him in a moment of confusion, would he, as a man and husband, still have to argue with her for the rest of his life?
That was the first time he faced his own heart, and the first time he faced his feelings for Song Yunpan - he suddenly realized that he seemed to like her already.
Maybe this kind of love is not deep enough or hot enough, but it is enough for them to spend the years together.
He even naively thought that things would turn around when Chunwei was named on the gold list this time... If his mother was still unwilling to accept Song Yunpan, at worst he would be like his eldest brother, letting him go for a while and leading the way.
After she takes office, when they have children of their own in the future, the mother will probably not embarrass her anymore even for the sake of the children...
That night, he silently watched her sleeping face and thought for a long time, and even stole a kiss before leaving.
When he left her house full of longing for the future, he did not expect that he would soon suffer the biggest setback in his life, let alone that their lives would soon develop in the opposite direction to what he expected.
Until he and Song Yunpan were pushed into the abyss of eternal destruction.
Maybe he caught a cold that night, or maybe he really got over the illness from Song Yunpan as his mother feared, but when he got up the next day, he felt light-headed and light-headed.
After forcing himself into the examination room, he was completely groggy... When the last session was over, he was almost carried back home.
The result can be imagined - even Su Cong from the third room was selected as the same Jinshi, but his name fell into the Sun Mountain, and he was not among the top three.
Even if he deliberately concealed it, his mother finally found out about his visit to Song Yunpan the night before the exam.
New grudges add to old grudges... anger, resentment, curses - he has no doubt that if possible, his mother would eat Song Yunpan alive.
Even if he repeatedly told his mother that it was no one's fault, and if someone had to bear the consequences, it should be him, but how could his furious mother listen? Even in the past, he would even try to persuade his mother when she went too far.
His father was also quite disappointed with his abnormal behavior in Chunwei, and simply stopped interfering in the affairs of the inner house. All of his mother's anger was directed at Song Yunpan.
Sometimes he gets the news and rushes to rescue her, but what follows is bound to be an intensified scolding and humiliation from his mother next time.
As time went by, he became even more afraid to do anything.
During that time, there was a lot of noise and chaos in the house all day long. In order to let him study in peace, his mother even suggested to his father that he move to another courtyard outside the city - it would take two or three days just to go back and forth.
He knew that Chunwei's defeat had broken his parents' hearts, and he had no shame to say any words of rejection, and he didn't want to cause trouble for Song Yunpan anymore, so he simply packed up his things and went to another hospital to study hard.
Except for holidays, I rarely come back.
But every time he went home, he found that Song Yunpan was getting thinner and thinner, and he was getting more and more silent.
There was nothing he could do.
He didn't even dare to show too much intimacy or comfort to his wife, for fear that his mother would embarrass her even more when he was not at home.
At the same time, my grandmother's body became weaker and weaker, and she eventually passed away without surviving that winter...
"Please be safe, Mrs. Su." There was a rustling sound in my ears, accompanied by the sound of footsteps. The curtain was opened from the outside, and Mrs. Su walked in quickly, surrounded by a group of girls and women.
"You're finally awake." The second wife walked directly to the bed, stretched out her hand to explore Su Heng's forehead, then let out a sigh of relief, and said with a distressed look on her face, "Look at you, you've been so thin these past few days that your face has become disfigured.
"It's..." She couldn't help but blushing as she said that. She quickly touched the corners of her eyes with a handkerchief and asked with concern, "What are you feeling now? Does your head still hurt? Are you dizzy?"
Chapter completed!