I woke up very thirsty, so I groped downstairs, scooped a ladle of cold water from the iron bucket, and drank it, which quenched my thirst. After drinking the water, I was completely awake.

It's still early before dawn. Let's go back upstairs and continue to lie down.

This person, please don't wake up in the early morning. Because you will find that once you wake up, you will feel even more lonely. You want to find someone to talk to, but there is no one to talk to you. You want to hum a few songs, but you are afraid of affecting others.

Turn on the lights, because you are afraid of wasting electricity bills. Don't turn on the lights, the dark night will be so depressing that you can't breathe.

Fortunately, the second floor is very transparent, and the smell of drunkenness does not remain much. Lying on the bed is not comfortable, and the backache is caused by tossing and turning, and even the neck and arms are sore and numb. Simply sit up and quietly

think.

Where to start thinking?

Looking back on the three years of studying abroad, it was over in a hurry and in the blink of an eye. What I learned is of no use in the current environment. It has been nearly three months since I stepped out of school.

It’s amazing to say that people have been separated for three days. But what about me? I haven’t made any progress. Apart from eating a few more months of food, I haven’t made any gains. There seem to be tens of thousands of roads in front of me, but there are only a few that can really be taken.

strip.

The teacher's earnest teaching "a red heart, two hands prepared". The first time I heard of it was when I was about to graduate from junior high school. At that time, it probably meant several meanings. Forgive me for being stupid, that's how I understood it at the time.

First of all, it means that students with good grades should not only be prepared to be admitted to a technical secondary school and start a job early, but also be prepared to be admitted to a high school and enter a university. The first choice is to be admitted to a technical secondary school and then graduate.

After all, you have to be the "best of the best" to get a job. Naturally, the high schools admitted to technical secondary schools are also admitted. This requires a trade-off and a choice. No matter how you choose, you must study hard.

Another meaning is that if you are not admitted to technical secondary school or high school, or if you are admitted and do not want to go to school, but want to get into a better school, you must be prepared to "re-study". It is just that "re-study students" will be in the next year's exam.

The admissions threshold will be raised by several tens of points. This is fair to "fresh graduates". When studying, you must also be prepared to face the risk of changes in admissions policies after one year, and face the risk of not being able to adapt to "re-reading" and resulting in insignificant results.

The risk of improvement or even decline. In the end, there is the risk of wasting time, wasting money, and not achieving the desired results.

Another meaning is that whether they are admitted to technical secondary school, high school or "re-reading", these students who continue to study should cherish the opportunity to study, strive to learn more knowledge, and become a useful person to society in the future; students who have not passed the exam should

When you start to enter society, no matter what kind of work you do, no matter how big or small your ability is, you must abide by the laws and regulations and be a useful person to society.

The second time I heard this sentence, I was about to graduate from technical secondary school. The head teacher said it at the last class meeting. That class meeting was unprecedentedly lively and harmonious. All the main teachers came to speak. Every teacher spoke to the class.

I made a summary of every detail of the past three years, and also commented on my classmates. I also apologized to my classmates for being too strict with them in my work in the past. I also sent my best wishes to my classmates for their future.

, write a message of blessing on each student’s graduation album.

The head teacher does not teach classes. He is only responsible for managing the class, teaching us about life, and subtly shaping our outlook on life, world view and values. At that time, our understanding of this sentence became more realistic.

"Employ first, then choose a career." Solve survival problems first, and then talk about ideals and feelings. It feels like the school has become a "store", we have become "commodities", and the employer has become "customers". The active power of "two-way choice", in fact,

It is firmly in their hands. Some students went to "Baima Cement Factory", some went to "Shenzhen SEG", some went to "Jialing Motorcycle Factory", and some went to Guangdong

"Shaoguan Casting and Forging Factory", some went to Chongqing "High Voltage Electric Porcelain Factory", some went to "Xinhua Machinery Factory", some went to sell insurance, some went to the water store to deliver bottled mineral water... And I gave up

When I got the opportunity to work in Sichuan, I also gave up the opportunity to work at "Dongfang Electric Machinery Factory" or "Enzhong" and chose to return to my hometown.

Why did I choose this?

On the one hand, because of the comprehensive impact of the tide of state-owned enterprise reform, the market economy and the wave of economic crises at that time, many state-owned enterprises were "precarious" and "serious losses". Those who could barely pay wages were good units.

, and wage arrears are a very normal thing. It is not unusual for someone to be laid off today and laid off tomorrow.

On the other hand, judging from the understanding of the factory during the internship. If you choose to enter the factory to become a worker, you will slowly grow into a technical backbone, a technical engineer, and become a senior engineer throughout your life.

An expert. On this road, the ideal is very full, but the reality is very backbone. Because in the world of technology, technical secondary schools are really too elementary. There are many outstanding college students, master's students, and doctoral students in front of them. This is a comparison.

Mount Everest is still an insurmountable "peak". Various other uncontrollable factors are even more uncertain. Maybe once I make this choice, I can only spend my whole life working on the front line of technology and around the production line. And this is not my ideal.

Life.

However, these thoughts can only be buried in my heart.

Only by trying to find a path that suits me, walking on it bravely, and striving to live the way I want to live, can I release this suppressed desire in my heart.

But now, nothing has been accomplished and I can't find a breakthrough. I feel that I have not yet boarded the train of society, and I am still wandering on the edge of society. Other kinds of "opportunities" are very colorful and full of temptation, but Sisi

The words "I can't go back" seem to still be echoing in my ears.

I haven't reached the point of "nowhere to go" yet, right? If life never gives me a chance, will I really go to "that step"?

I am asking myself, asking myself thousands of times.

In fact, I told myself more than once. No matter whether it is the underworld or the white path, what is the "way back"? Once today passes, it will become the past, become the past, and become unchangeable history. How to go back? You can't go back at all.

Head. All you can do is to either continue walking, or adjust the direction and keep walking. You can't stop even if you want to. No matter whether you want to go or not, society will always drag you rolling and crawling towards the future.

Society will not stop its progress for you just because you say I am not ready yet. All you can do is adjust yourself to adapt to it and keep up with its pace, so that you will not be "abandoned" by society.

”.
Chapter completed!