118 Xu Cheng I Don't Need You Anymore
I lay in his arms, breathed his breath for a while, and then, I slowly said: Xu Cheng, let's break up.
His whole body trembled like an electric shock, and his eyes immediately became particularly painful, but then he asked me coldly: Is it because of Dai Xiangwei?
I smiled, laughing with tears in my eyes, and said: If I wanted to choose him, why wait until now...
He hugged my arms and let go of it in an instant. He said: That's it, don't lie to yourself. When he hugged you, the real smile on your face would not lie to you...
I shook my head and said: I am not a woman who can easily fall in love with others.
He questioned me, and he said: Do you dare to say that you don’t feel anything about him?
I really wanted to nod, but in the end I was silent. There was indeed some unexplainable feeling between Dai Xiangwei and I. If I deny it, I felt it was contrary to my heart.
He actually smiled, and he kissed my forehead gently as gently as before, and he said: In this case, you are far less dedicated than you imagined. When I saw you freely turn around with every man, I thought to myself that you would not be a calm woman. You have your unique rules of the game, which is different from many women...
I also laughed, and I said: I have known each other for so many years and have been in love for so long. Is that how do you see me?
The guilt in his eyes flashed clearly, but in the blink of an eye, he became hardened again, and he said: I know you better than anyone else.
I said: I am the same, because I know you, so I am desperate.
He said loudly: Well said! Because of understanding, he is desperate. As expected, people still cannot get too close to each other, which hurts others and yourself.
I said: Xu Cheng, I understand. It’s not that the time has not come between us, it’s not that you can’t afford it, it’s me, it’s not the person you want, right?
He looked at me with a very deep eyes. I said: Xu Cheng, answer me, right?
He still chose to remain silent, he avoided the important and said lightly: You are drunk, I will help you change your clothes and go to bed early...
At that moment, my heart was as anxious as millions of ants crawling. I said: Xu Cheng, can you face the problem directly? Why are you always evasive and why are you always escaping? Have you never loved me?
He lowered his head in pain and said: In that case, can I not answer? Everything is not what you imagined...
I suddenly roared, and I felt that I could no longer bear the hard work of being close and distant. I said: Xu Cheng, are you a fucking man? Will you die if you love me? If you don’t love me, don’t suck my appetite? Everyone is very busy, can you leave some time to talk about love and hobbies? Can you not torture each other like this? Can you open your heart like you were at the beginning? Can you be treated with the most basic honesty?...
He had never seen me out of control like this, but at this moment, I really didn't want to pretend. My world of Yi Zhizhi has always been clearly distinguished from black and white. If you love, love it well. If you don't love it well, just get out early. I don't want to live like this, go all the way around the sky and the ground. It's so heartbreaking!
He said slowly: That's it, how about controlling your emotions? The more you do this, the less I don't know what to say...
I found that it had only been a while since he had returned to the face he had when he was my boss, and suddenly he pushed me into the cold palace. Suddenly, everything I did was wrong in his eyes. I was suddenly pushed far away by him, so far that I could not see hope. I felt that I had no patience and no confidence to go on with him...
It turns out that love is so hurtful, it is different from what I imagined...
I said: Xu Cheng, go. I don’t need you anymore, I can live a good life alone...
He showed great pain on his face, and he said: Yes, do you really want this? If I leave, I will never come back...
At this moment, can I still hope? Facing such a man who is not good at scrupulous and invulnerable to swords and swords, I feel that I have no extra words to express. What else can I say? I thought of a sentence I saw a long time ago: Is the departure of the leaves a wind pursuing or the irresistible tree?
Every woman who actively proposes to break up has a heart that wants to be kept. But he doesn't understand that the man in front of him can be powerful in the shopping mall, can shuttle among different women, and can take me alone in the mountains and rivers. But when I said I was going to leave, he was never willing to let go of his dignity and say he wanted to keep him...
I nodded and said: You go, I've had enough of you...
He slowly put me on the bed, reluctantly grabbed my hand and kissed it on his lips, and said: Have a good sleep, since you hate me so much, I will not appear in your sight...
He actually left like this. When he closed the door gently, I grabbed the pillow and threw it towards the door, and then cried uncontrollably... This relationship that I thought I could live for the rest of my life was finally at the end of my mind. I died with my eyes closed, and I didn't even know why...
Yes, the relationship is gone, life still has to continue. It is too hard to fall in love with a man like a king, or maybe no matter who he falls in love with, it is a particularly hard thing. Love is really a great luxury for me.
I once again devoted all my energy to work, but now, I no longer have the urge to be shoulder to shoulder, because I found that even if I am excellent one day, he may not want to hold my hand and smile at the world... My efforts are purely to make myself have something to do and save myself from thinking about him if I have time.
As a woman who needs healing, when I was most desperate and helpless, I thought of my fairy. I threw myself into her arms and cried. She gave me the most detailed analysis. She said that I felt that the fate between Xu Cheng and me was not so shallow, and that she always looked at people very accurately.
I said, but we have really come to an end. Xu Cheng and I always seem to be like this, and it always suddenly drops to freezing point, and suddenly no one belongs to anyone else. The fairy said in a very literary way: Because you don’t understand the true meaning of love yet...
I asked: What is the true meaning of love...
The fairy said: I just don’t worry about how much I love, as long as I know each other, it’s enough...
I had an epiphany and said: I love you, why not be together...
She nodded and said: That's the reason.
I said: Then only when we reach your age, perhaps experience will make us calm, time will waste our endurance, we will snuggle together lazily, and every day we open and close our eyes and feel that it is enough as long as we see each other. But now we cannot reach this state and live such a life.
The fairy touched my head and said: As long as you have some understanding, love is a kind of understanding, and those who are destined to meet again.
I nodded and asked: Fairy, have you never thought about marrying Lao Liu?
She smiled and said: At my age, what else can I do? If I can live one more day, I will enjoy the love of one more day. We are all people who are counting down our lives.
When the fairy said this, I realized that aging was very close to my fairy. Once upon a time, the fairy who kept talking about her forever young had such clichés in her mouth...
But my fairy, she has lived for most of her life and has never worn a wedding dress...
I hugged her little body in my arms. She used to be my god, but now I have become her god. No, she still has Lao Liu, a man who appears late but is willing to treat the fairy wholeheartedly.
The fairy said: When you meet true love, you are cherished enough. You have not seen many women busy all their lives, but you never know what true love looks like...
Yes, there are a thousand kinds of love in a thousand eyes. Although they say almost the same thing, and although they do almost the same things, the ever-changing feelings of each person have caused a huge difference in their own views of emotions. In love, there is really no right or wrong. Just continue if you think it is good, and stop if you think it is bad. That's all, there is nothing right or wrong.
You love him, moral public opinion, and secular prejudice are not reasons; if you don’t love him, he just puts a p on it, and you think he is enough to make you hate... Love is really something that cannot be said.
I actually discussed love with the fairy all night. This woman who met true love in her later years actually encountered the same problems as me in her emotions, but she was obviously more indifferent than me. She thought that staying together day and night was far more important than those so-called forms. But I said that no woman did not expect a grand wedding, and she would be the same no matter how old she was.
Because I clearly saw a trace of undetectable loneliness in the fairy's eyes. I understand her heart.
It’s not that Lao Liu doesn’t want to marry her, but that he faces all the same problems in the evening love. Lao Liu was once a middle-level cadre in a public institution. He had a lot of income, had real estate, good family business, and a considerable pension. Although his son, who was dedicated to training, was far away in another country, he was always thinking about Lao Liu’s property.
Lao Liu lived with the fairy in anger. This incident has been criticized by many people in Lao Liu's circle. Lao Liu, who lived his whole life just to gain a good reputation, encountered a fairy's reputation in his later years, but he said that the time he spent with the fairy was the most peaceful, realistic and living time for himself in his life.
But his son would not accept the fairy inserted into his family out of thin air. He was afraid that the fairy who was in his teenage years old would be divided into part of his property one day in the future. People's hearts are selfish. He did not think that his father's old age happiness was more important than Lao Liu's money and property...
The secular world also does not allow Lao Liu and the fairy. Although they are both single, the fact that Lao Liu and the fairy live together without marriage has made Lao Liu laughed at by their former partners. What Lao Liu can give to the fairy is probably just ignore these rumors and firmly hold the fairy's hand and walk in the dusk...
Chapter completed!